transitions

It is such a unique period of transition for the people in my life, including myself. A solid part inside of me is aching to get started, to launch my presence into some greater part of the world and start living. But then I pause and remember that I never ceased living. In fact, for the past 29 years I have done more living than many people twice my age. Yet here I am, wondering about my place in my world. I managed to escape the influences in my world who feel I would be best off leaving all I know and love for the sake of earning money. As spineless as I can be, I defended my right to love rather than the need to make more money ( ;) it’s not so bad).

And here I sit, a foggy, brilliant path laid out before me, unfortunately it is all on hold for reasons beyond our control. It is not unlike that wonderous circus scene in Big Fish. I can see everything, reach out and touch it, gaze into the eyes of everyone sharing my space, smell each beautiful lily- but nothing is there, nothing is vibrant and welcoming. That is what we are waiting for and it is near agony. So exciting, frightening, comforting and happy….but not yet, I can’t even count down the sleeps.

My landlady is selling our house. What really sucks about that is the noise and fuss that is involved in prepping the house for market. I suppose that is the nature of real estate. The people outside of my bedroom window are killing me. As if the noise and traffic weren’t enough. I long for the day when I will be able to comfortably sleep in, in my own comfy bed. I find it fascinating that she is investing so much into a house she won’t get to enjoy.

I wish for me today~ kisses and hugs and many smiles: this week: keep your fingers crossed for the news we need to jump back into life, I am trying to be patient but it is soooo hard!

*love and hugz* to: Princess Jessi for last weekend (t’was a wonder- thank you), James ‘cause he is getting even less sleep than I am, and Chrissie just ‘cause she’s cute and so disenchanted with the world of blogs and media as we know it.